It was just a shoelace.
A small, ordinary, everyday shoelace, the kind Scarlett had tied a hundred times before.
But today, it would not cooperate.
She looped it. It slipped loose. She looped it again, more carefully this time. It came apart in her hands.
“Come ON,” she muttered, yanking at it.
The knot tightened into a hard little ball.
Scarlett’s face went hot. Her hands felt clumsy and useless. She wasn’t angry exactly; nobody had done anything to her, nothing was unfair, it was that something inside her felt tight and stuck and too much, all because of one small shoelace.
She threw the shoe across the room. It bounced off the wardrobe with a thud.
Lenny, who had been sitting quietly on the bed the whole time, didn’t flinch.
“That shoelace is really not cooperating,” he observed.
“It’s STUPID,” said Scarlett. “I’ve tied my shoes a million times. Why can’t I do it today?”
“Hmm,” said Lenny. “Can I tell you something about this feeling?”
Scarlett, still glaring at the shoe, nodded.
“This isn’t anger,” said Lenny. “Nothing unfair happened. Nobody hurt you. This is a different feeling. It’s called frustration. It happens when something is just... hard. Harder than it should be. Harder than you expected.”
Scarlett thought about that. “It feels like anger though. Hot. Like I want to throw things.”
“They can feel similar,” Lenny agreed. “Frustration isn’t about something being unfair. It’s about something being difficult, and your brain getting tired of trying.”
“So what do I do? I still have to tie my shoe.”
“You do,” said Lenny. “First, though, your brain might need a tiny break. Sometimes the most useful thing isn’t trying harder right away. It’s stepping back for a moment.”
Scarlett picked up the shoe, looked at the tangled lace, and instead of immediately attacking it again, she took a breath.
She wiggled her fingers.
She looked out the window for ten whole seconds.
Then she picked the knot apart slowly, one loop at a time, without rushing.
It came undone.
She tied the lace properly, first try.
“There,” she said, feeling oddly proud of a shoelace.
“There,” Lenny agreed. “Frustration doesn’t mean you can’t do it. It just means you needed a moment before you could.”
🫶 Dream big dreams.